By Arwa Darukhanawalla
We've all been there; there always tends to be someone who creeps under your skin, pulling out the "monster" that is Jealousy. It chases you. And no matter how fast you run, it always seems to catch up. When it has you in its clutches, it pulls you into the darkest places. So, allow me to introduce you to Jealousy.
Jealousy pushes your buttons to an extent where you feel obliged to change yourself or something in your life, whether it's what you eat, what you wear, the car you drive, where you shop, or the technology you use, Jealousy finds a way to seep into even the most hidden corners of your life. Every human being is flawed, and that’s normal. But Jealousy amplifies those flaws, narrowing your vision so that it’s the only thing you see, and the only thing you focus on. And, the longer Jealousy stays, the more you pick yourself apart.
Maintaining high self-esteem has become something extremely challenging to achieve. It's also one of Jealousy's primary targets. The world of social media has 'cropped' minds to think of a singular lifestyle as "living the dream". For example, living in an enormous house or mansion, driving the most expensive cars, eating at five-star restaurants and shopping at designer stores. These are the living situations of a few influencers. If someone doesn't have the capability to do this, insecurities begin to immerse them as they feel pressured to live that lifestyle. And, the more they realise it's not attainable, the faster their self-esteem drops.
And in the perfect moment, the perfect time to strike, Jealousy continues to build a mountain of insecurities. One seeming too steep, and too far up for you to climb. This high-rise is built on a ground of Depression, Anxiety, and Loneliness. You feel defenseless, like you’re no match for Jealousy and it’s ‘army’. They infiltrate your mind to make you see yourself as weaker than your insecurities. They suffocate you and trap you in a bubble where all you see is what you think you have to change about yourself. Some face repercussions like Addiction, even Suicide.
It’s important to remember that you don't have to change yourself to fit someone else's idea of what happiness is supposed to be (or feel like). Don't let someone else define your level of happiness and what it means to you. Don't accomplish something or buy something to convince Jealousy to go away. Instead, try your hardest to succeed at something for yourself and prove to yourself that you don't necessarily need what others have to sustain your happiness. Something my mom told me has stuck with me for a while, “Other people may be able to travel first-class, and go to the most exotic destinations. It seems like they have it all, but I don’t know that. I might have something they don’t. My friends, for example. Or my job, or my family.” Everyone has their own classification of what happiness is, and the objects, experiences, and people that make them feel this way. It can even be found in the darkest of places. You just have to know where to look.
When you find Jealousy starting to retreat from your mind, along with its army, you'll be able to focus on other aspects of your life, like your family and friends, your job, your home, and more. When you find yourself surrounded by people who love you for who you are, you'll come to realise that who you are and what you have is enough. And it’s those people who burst the bubble you were once trapped in. When you feel insecure about yourself, that’s when you need your people the most. It’s like an elephant has lifted one of its feet off your chest.
I started with, ‘Jealousy always being able to catch up, no matter how fast you run.’ I’ve learned, when you accept yourself and appreciate what you have, Jealousy runs out of breath.
*Author’s note: Hi! This piece is not meant to disrepute anyone who lives in a large house, travels as I mentioned, etc. Everyone earns what they’ve worked hard for. The aim of this comparison was to clear up the misconception that money is the only thing that leads to happiness.
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